The protagonist, Manami, gave birth to a baby boy named Tomoya. Her husband wanted to use the same kanji as his mother’s name, Tomoko, for the baby’s name, but Manami resisted, explaining that it would make her constantly think of her mother-in-law. After a heartfelt discussion, her husband agreed not to use the same kanji. They eventually settled on the name Tomoya with the kanji “灯也”, and both were happy with the choice. They realized the importance of open communication and compromise in their relationship, and decided to support their son Tomoya’s growth together.
Continuing from the last time. I (Manami) have given birth to my first son. Before the birth, my husband (Hiroki) and I had some name candidates, but the name “Tomoya” was decided upon seeing our newborn son. Then my husband suggested changing the kanji to “智也”. Actually, my mother-in-law’s name is “智子 (Satoko)”. Though I have a good relationship with my mother-in-law, I resist using the same kanji. However, no matter how much I explain to my husband, nothing gets through, like “even if the kanji is the same, the reading is different” or “do you hate my mother that much?” I can’t just give in to this. I resolved myself, and I was the one who persuaded my husband again.
I carefully conveyed my feelings to my husband. It’s not that I don’t like my mother-in-law. But by giving the same kanji to “Tomoya (temporary)”, I can’t help but be reminded of my mother-in-law. It’s not just about my mother-in-law, it’s the same for anyone’s name. “Tomoya (temporary)” is our child. Because I feel uncomfortable, I want to use a different kanji.
It’s not about superficially getting one character from my mother-in-law or not, I firmly conveyed that I don’t want characters from anyone, and my husband accepted that.
Now the two of us discussed firmly about the kanji to use for “Tomoya (temporary)”.
There was also the option of changing the name “Tomoya (temporary)” itself, but when my husband and I saw the face of our newborn child, “Tomoya (temporary)” came to mind. We didn’t want to change it. So we looked back on the time “Tomoya (temporary)” was born. The late-night hospital, the anxiety before birth, and our child born into this world. As we remembered that time, we realized that there was a kanji that fit perfectly.
My mother-in-law was very happy when she heard the name “灯也”. I thought it was a good decision to choose this kanji. My husband and I were originally strangers. It’s natural for our values and ways of thinking to be different. That’s why I felt I wanted to make an effort to clearly convey what I didn’t like. I want to give our child what we both agreed on. Instead of one person imposing sacrifices on the other, we want to find a compromise and move forward. It was really good that we had such a constructive discussion. From now on, I want to support the growth of “灯也” with my husband.
Original concept: Mamasta Community Script: Tae Watanabe Drawing: Yoshi Editing: Miyabi